in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Can you repeat that, but with context?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
