my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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