At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
