apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
