What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
