I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
