Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize