ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
