Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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