if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Vodka?
Forever.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
