remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I want to walk on stilts...naked
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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