fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
