I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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