You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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