i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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