I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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