She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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