Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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