fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
i believe in u and ur pee
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
