I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
