STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
