p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
