Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Randomize
