forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Randomize
