38 yer olds are good kisserssss
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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