Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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