The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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