where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Small penises have feelings too.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
