All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
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