WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Randomize
