I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
