I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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