I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Randomize
