In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
