She's JV to your varsity
Me too!
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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