You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Is it because I queefed?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I want her autograph on my taint
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
