oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I could have mohawked her pubes.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
