Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
You are the jesus of drinking
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
