I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
What changed your mind?
Being sober
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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