I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
