I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
