Dual....:-)
smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I deserve this hangover.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
