the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
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