SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
