Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize