I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Sorry my hands just texted you
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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