Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
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