I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize
