"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
