Heybabeimwearingurpanties
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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